When Life Goes Right
Despite depression trying to make things go wrong as much as they can, things have actually been going right for one in my life. I feel as though I’m back on track to where I want my life to go. It’s a terrible feeling to have everything thrown into turmoil because of a suicide attempt. It’s almost as though you’re starting back from square one. Depression often makes things feel like you take two steps back for every one you take forwards. Yet eventually, you get to a point where you begin to make actual progress and that feeling is wonderful.
For those of you that don’t know, I really dislike my current job. It’s taxing both mentally and physically, yet at the same time it’s just redundant busy work. Also at my company, which I’ve been with you two years, I have not seen a raise since I ended my probationary period from my first 90 days. Now if you ask me, my company doesn’t really make its employees feel valued, it makes them feel disposable, which is not a good thing. However, I got a new job that starts in 2 weeks, at a much larger company, doing similar busy work, but at better pay and closer to home. Plus I have a feeling that his company, while much larger, will still make me feel like I’m valuable, which is not something that I often feel.
I’m also planning to go back to college to finish my degree, that I missed out on thanks to my mental health. I actually have an open house at a local community college that I’m going to to see about getting an associates degree. College is something that someone in my field, biology, needs to progress in their career.
I’m of the belief that everything happens for a reason. There is a reason that I was born with a malfunctioning brain. There is a reason that I tried to kill myself 3 times. There is a reason why I didn’t graduate college in 4 years. I have to think like this, or else my life would be filled with regrets. I wanted to thank you all so much for being with me here on this blog, I feel that it is another reason for my success recently. I hope that soon you all will be able to say similar things as I am now, that your life is going right. If not, keep up your hopes, because eventually, things will get better.