I haven’t written in a while, as you may have been able to tell. I apologize for that, my own battle with depression has grown ever more fervent. Most days it’s all I can do just to simply survive the day, crawl into bed at the end and lay there until I fall asleep. For those of you who don’t know, insomnia is a very common symptom with depression. It happens to be one of the most troublesome that I deal with. Believe it or not, I’d rather fight suicidal thoughts every day than not get a good night’s sleep. Unfortunately for me, I have to deal with both. If you’ve ever experienced the pain of having your eyelids grow heavy but your mind is screaming uncontrollably, than I know what that’s like. It seems, before I was on medication for sleep, that it would take me hours to fall asleep. My father always used to say, “just lie down and close your eyes. You’ll fall asleep in no time.” Little did he know, that I was suffering from severe insomnia. His “advice” never once worked for me, and I tried everything I could to help me sleep, to no avail. I tried melatonin, binaural beats, meditation, nature sounds, and while they offered some success at times, they were mostly useless. Although I do wholeheartedly recommend melatonin as a natural sleeping pill alternative. It wasn’t until I tried over the counter sleeping pills that I found some relief. Ironically enough, it was those same pills that I would overdose on trying to kill myself.
Sleep is still something that I struggle with every single night, and I know that some of you can definitely relate. Coming from someone who has had sleeping problems all my life, I have one recommendation. Talk you your doctor, or psychiatrist, and tell them about your sleep problems and earnestly request medication. It wasn’t until I tried sleeping medications, I use remeron now, that I finally found relief in my oldest struggle. Sleep is your greatest ally in the fight against depression. So you should do whatever it takes to get a good night’s sleep. Although I would definitely say to stay away from over the counter medications, as they can be tricky, addictive, and even dangerous if used incorrectly. With that, I need to get to sleep myself, just felt like getting this out before I drift into my favorite state of being…unconsciousness. Odd, I know, but we’ll save that for another time. Good night, and sleep well my friends.